Skating

Today I hit the rink for the first time in years. I was thrilled to have the opportunity to chill (no pun intended) with three lovely ladies, but not so thrilled to actually get on the ice. But the encouragement extended to me from my beautiful friends was wonderful and I made it around once... and again... and again. Success! BUT, I was incredibly tense. I was so afraid of falling, not because it physically hurts to fall, but because I didn't want anyone to see me fall (especially my very talented friends who have more experience than myself). As I was thinking why I felt this particular way, I realized my pride in this area of my life is significantly large. The thing that gets me is that my pride and insecurities were totally unwarranted this morning. Why? Because one of my friends said if I were to fall out on the ice, she would have fallen with me. I believe she was being completely sincere or at least, she would have done something to help me up. No matter how much I want people to be vulnerable with me, I need to remember that it is important for me to be vulnerable with others. I will share my past struggles in a heartbeat, if I know God can use it for a purpose or if it will help someone to understand where I am coming from. But when it is the here and now, I have more of a difficult time putting my heart out there because at that point in time, I have not yet figured everything out. This morning was a here and now situation. My pride made me so tense, limited my movement and as a result, I experienced physical pain. It reminds me of a verse that says, "Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall" (Proverbs 16:18). While trying to avoid a fall, I in all reality set myself up for a harder fall. Pride, comparing myself to others and my fears are not of God. If I let those issues consume my thoughts, play a role in how I see myself, how will I be effective at telling others not to believe the same lies? I will not be effective, because: (1) I will not grow; (2) my attitude and actions will be negative; (3) I will not be encouraging to others when they need it, and (4) God will not be glorified. Simple as that. To be humble and to accept I will fall will build me up. Perhaps it will hurt when I fall and people will see me fall, but by accepting it, I will have the ability to get back up faster. I will learn more. Again, a verse from Proverbs says it all, "When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom" (Proverbs 11:2). How true. I am amazed at the daily lessons God brings to my attention and thankful His word totally backs it up. Thanks for a refreshing skate, girls. :)